Do you ever have to deal with difficult people? Even people who are angry?
When you are with a difficult person you may not have the advantage of already showing them The ACT Matrix diagram. If the person is angry, then you probably won’t get very far trying to show them diagram anyway.
With that said, you want The ACT Matrix inside of your head before you start dealing with difficult or angry people. Having the diagram in your head will allow you and the person you are dealing with to find a way through difficult waters.
The good news is that getting diagram in your head is easy. Look at the diagram and quickly run through the ten (10) points.
1. Notice your five senses.
2. Notice recalling your five senses in your mind.
3. Notice the difference between your five senses and mental experiencing.
4. Recall how it feels to move toward someone who is important to you.
5. Recall how it feels to move away from something inside of you like fear.
6. Notice the difference between how it feels to recall moving toward and moving away.
7. List a few people (spouse, friends, family, etc.) who are important to you.
8. List some of the thoughts and feelings (like fear) that can get in the way of moving toward who’s important.
9. List some of the behaviors that you do (like avoid) to move away from the unwanted stuff.
10. List some behaviors you could do to move toward who’s important to you.